Well, I Am An Adult, So Nah!
Well, I Am An Adult, So Nah!
By chronicpainhero
Okay folks. I kinda thought that part of being an adult was being responsible for your actions and accepting consequences of those actions. I may be wrong but wouldn’t that include apologizing when we do something wrong to somebody? So, if we should apologize when we do something wrong to somebody, how many times should we apologize to make it right? Is one time enough? How about ten times? Or does the number of times we need to apologize equal the number of people we offended? Can I issue one mass apology and let that be it for everyone in the group or should I make sure that everyone I have wronged is apologized for properly? Then again, what is a proper apology?
Say I did something bone-headed, stupid, ignorant, ass backwards, foot in my mouth, jackass of all times bad like, oh, I don’t know, yelled out that the president of the United States of America was a lie during an address to congress and the nation while I was a sitting congressman. Would that require an apology? And if so, who should I be held accountable to apologize to? Do the people of the United States deserve an apology because I violated every protocol known to congress when I made my disparaging, idiotic, self-serving, piss ant of a person, remark? Do I owe my colleagues, the ones who I made look bad by association when I did what had never been done before on the floor of congress to any president? Do I owe an apology to the people who had the audacity to think that I was in my right mind, that I was intelligent and not some backwoods, boontucket, bumfuddled, brickwacker, bait for brains jerk and voted for me to be their congressman and represent them in Washington?
Of course I don’t. I’m a congressman by golly and I know what they need, I know what they want. If it wasn’t for me, they would all be lost. NO, I am going to apologize one time and that’s that. If that ain’t good enough for anybody then they can just go sit in the dark and get over it because I am not going to make more than one apology. Heck, I don’t really want to make the one apology because I’m so full of myself and I know every dadgum thing there is to know so I don’t think I should be apologizing anyway and who does President Obama think he is anyway? Hell, he ain’t nobody but the PRESIDENT OF THESE UNITED STATES OF AMERICA. Not like that position means anything anyway. Hell, just any old body can be president. I mean, only the majority of AMERICA voted for him to be president. Everybody didn’t vote for him so it’s not like he’s GOD or something. He’s just another guy like me. We both put our pants on one leg at a time. Yeah, so what he’s a world leader and I’m just some smuck who got elected to congress? So what he has the respect of most of America and most of America don’t even know who the hell I am?
Just because he is the PRESIDENT OF THE UNITED STATES OF AMERICA, that doesn’t make him in some elite club or nothing like the klan I belong too. I mean, we are a special bunch. You don’t get to be this stupid, ignorant, jack-assed, backwoods dense, waterheaded, shit for brains dumb overnight. No, it takes generations of people passing down their ignorance and raising their youngins to be just as ignorant to get to be a big enough ass to actually yell out that the PRESIDENT OF THE UNITED STATES of AMERICA is a lie during a national address to congress and the country on the floor of congress. No, it takes a special kind of self pride and egotism to do something that stupid. Not anybody can do something that disgraceful. So, see, I am special. I am about as bad an example of what being a congressman should be.
And you know what, after all that is said and done, I aint gonna apologize but one time. I don’t care if they pass a whatchamacallit and demand that I apologize for my stupid outburst, if I was to do something that stupid, I would just look at them all right in the eye and say, ” WELL, I AM AN ADULT, SO NAH!”
a satirical look at something dumb by V.Holland aka Chronic Pain Hero
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